What was Jason Kenney like in school?

Maybe because I was a teacher, I wonder what people were like as kids. I’ve watched a few grow older and I like to think my guesses can be fairly accurate. Public school is that time in our lives when we’re relatively equal. No matter your socio-economic background, in the classroom you’re all the same. Of course, as one progresses through school, everyone starts to separate into different groups, some claiming a higher status than others. Higher status can be based on a number indices like athletic ability, physical appearance and parental income.

My dad was an elementary school principal who had a decent income but not compared with the fathers of my friends who were doctors, dentists, accountants, lawyers, small business owners and managers for the outlets of large companies like the Hudson Bay or Westinghouse. My friends might holiday in more exotic locations but at school, we were essentially all the same, nerdy guys a little slow maturing into adolescence. (I looked about 12 when I entered my first year of university.) We were all relatively bookish and liked sports but, except for one or two, didn’t have the talent to participate in an organized league.

So, when a man or woman becomes the leader of the province or country, I kind of wonder what he or she would have been like. (I already know what the mayor of our town was like. I taught him.) I suspect Justin Trudeau was at the top of the heap as far as social status goes in a school. Even though he attended public elementary school, he spent his senior high years in private school. That said, I can imagine if he was one of those guys who was very popular but everyone liked, the kind that other guys like to hate but who doesn’t return the favour.

Jason Kenney would have had a very different high school experience. Jason attended Athol Murray College of Notre Dame, a private high school where his dad was the headmaster and, even though the school was Catholic, it’s primary focus was athletics, not religion or education. The talents of 100 future NHL stars were all nurtured on the Olympic size hockey rink his father had raised money to build. These players include Wendel Clark, Brad Richards, Curtis Joseph, Jordan Eberle and Vincent Lecavalier. 

But Jason’s interest wasn’t hockey. It was politics and religion. His energies went into such activities as memorizing the results of both federal and provincial election results which he could recite on demand. Can you imagine? 

It can't have been easy for Jason in school being a geek amongst all those athletes and then having his

dad as principal. My wife's dad was principal and some of the kids accused her of being a nark. Jason, I can't see him being accused of being a nark. Afterall, who would invite him along on escapades where he could fulfill that role. No, I think Jason was back in his room memorizing election results and contemplating religion and honing his ordered libertarian philosophy.

But what about his libedo. Most of us are obsessed with it in high school and the results can be witnessed in an older selves whatever our orientation. For Jason, that choice is not evident in a relationship that the media has yet to record. He does have a record of advocating for a strict following of Christian dogma. (See past issues of the "San Francisco Foghorn", the student newspaper of the San Francisco University.)

For Jason, Catholic doctrine is objective truth. According to this same church, sex is for the purpose of procreation, that is, regular sex within the confines of the union of marriage without any form of contraception. Since Jason isn't married, one must assume that he is either not interested in a heterosexual relationship or he doesn't want children. Since any other form of sexual activity is forbidden, then the only other option is abstinence. Some may think this is ridiculous. Can the man not pursue the wishes of God through politics? 

I imagine a girl making a comment about women’s rights in Jason’s social studies class, the kind of social class that Jason believes are the provocateurs of left-wing propaganda today. He spots the girl in the cafeteria during lunchtime. She’s sitting quietly with a friend discussing a physics assignment because her feelings about women’s rights are a fact for her. They don’t warrant further discussion. After all, this fight has already been made by her mother and grandmother.

But, for Jason, it’s not over. He approaches the girls with his cabal of followers and seats himself across from the girl whom we’ll call Kelly.

 Hey Kelly, Jason says. How ya doin’?

Jason, please don’t bother me. 

I heard you speak out about women’s rights and abortion today in social class today. You were talking like they’re one and the same.

They are.

Abortion’s not the same as women’s rights

How’s that?

Abortion is killing. 

Go away Jason.
Once a woman is pregnant, her body also belongs to the baby.

Says you, you puerile little man.

Says the church.

What do I care what the church says?

This is a Catholic school, Jason replies. That is the reason you’re supposed to be here, because you’re Catholic.

Do I have to believe everything the church tells me to be Catholic?

That is what it means to follow a religion.

You really believe that?

If you’re Catholic, you can’t pick and choose what you believe.
Why not? Can’t I be mostly Catholic. Do I have to believe everything the Pope tells me?

Of course, you do, says Jason. That’s how it works.

Okay then, to you I’m not Catholic but for the rest of these people, (and she gestures to all the others sitting in the cafeteria) I am.

You think all these people believe in abortion?

Most of them.

Well, bottom line, I don’t want you speaking up about abortion in class anymore.

And who’s going to stop me?

I talked to Laura after class.

Our teacher?

The very one. I told her that she shouldn’t be allowing you to advocate for abortion in this school.

What she say?

She said that you were expressing an opinion and that you had the right to an opinion.

She’s right.

So, I went to David.

The department head?

Yah.

What did he say?

The same thing.

So that’s the end of it?

I talked to my dad.

What did he say?

He didn’t want to deal with it. He sent me to Mr. Daily.

The assistant headmaster.

That’s the one.

What did he say?

The same thing. It’s a classroom discussion. Students are allowed to discuss. So, I’m going to take it to Father O’Brien.

What’s he supposed to do?

Something. He can’t just have students blaspheming the church in school.

I’m not blaspheming the church, Kelly says for the first time looking outraged.

How are you not when you question its teachings?

Fuck off, Jason.

You can tell me to fuck off, says Jason getting up from his seat, but you haven’t heard the last of me.

I would presume to believe so. You’re such a cry-baby I’m sure you’d take your concerns to the pope should anyone have the temerity to contradict you.

You just watch me, he says.

I will, says Kelly smiling. Even though she despised the guy, at least for the moment, he was harmless.